The Banana Box Thing

You would think it was a simple thing

to tell you about a banana box lid, right?

BUT

the story of Banana Boxes is a big story to tell,

because it involves

WOOD.

And the story of

WOOD,

in relation to the store,

IS HUGE.

It is so huge that I have been avoiding it,
although I find it endlessly fascinating.

I haven't even shown you all the stoves in the cellar, ffs.

See? I am starting to feel overwhelmed this very moment.

I guess I just have to go slowly, in parts.
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Chapter I - The Glut
~~~ ~~~ ~~~ 

Once Upon A Time

there was a banana box lid surplus.

 They lived on the wide cellar stairs near the produce room.

 It was an impressive surplus.

There were banana box lids stashed in strange places, places about which, at the time, I knew nothing.

In fact, I knew very little about banana box lid usage, although, exhibiting signs of the premier human character flaw, I thought I knew it ALL.


You couldn't help noticing all those banana box lids choking the wide cellar stairs and stuffed in strange cellar closets. What was the destiny of all these lids? Was supply going to exceed available on-site storage?

I had my eye on The Situation.

Once in a while some noob would improperly dispose of a banana box lid. And we would all be like, "OMG! WHO MURDERED THE BANANA BOX LID?? Call the CSIs! Stay back! This is a crime scene!" Banana box lids are protected by Dan & Whit's Law, which is NEVER questioned. If you are supposed to save banana box lids then, no matter how many you see around you, you WILL save banana box lids.

Then gradually, without my really noticing it, the surplus began to dwindle.

And one day this winter, about a year after the glut, a Very Shocking Thing happened. The wide cellar stairs were empty. There were NO BANANA BOX LIDS ON THE STAIRS AT ALL.

NONE.

And THAT was a destiny moment.

Where had they all gone?
Why had they all gone?
Who was using them?
And for what?